Scattered memos to Nobody: Always a catch-22

Tuesday, July 30, 2019

Always a catch-22

Wanting to stay in bed.. but not wanting to stay in bed... I am sick and in so much pain.. I have acquired someone else's funk again... more sickness and infection.. yuck. Wanting to watch a movie , but not being able to see well and not being able to decide on what era and type.. or flick.. grrrr.

such as my everyday pretty much.

I have been so up and down.. I am ok enough to want to go outside and see people and then after a minute.. I am sick again.. I get weak, anxious, hot, nauseas, and so on. My neighbors probably don't know what to think.. phil tells them I am sick then within 24 hrs they see me outside for a minute and they probably think we fibbed to them about how I was feeling.. I can reassure all.. that is not the case. I can be ok and then hour later.. cant see, hear, feel, walk and or talk straight etc.. just no telling when and where it will hit.. such is why we don't plan stuff anymore,, and things are so strange and etc on our schedules and agendas.. Why I have no life anymore, cant work, and have to do stuff when and while I can. FRUSTRATING indeed to put it mildly... which always leads me to catch 22's ..grrrr.

Want to see people and be social.. cant handle sound and smells. Want to listen to music, but have headaches and ears hurt. Want to clean, do house stuff, yard stuff, but cant do it after about 2 seconds have to stop sometimes.. or I muster through and pay for it dearly later.. grrr..
Wanting to do Social Media.. but not wanting to do it at the same time... granted I don't do anything these days but, FB, IG, SC (with close peeps), and maybe just drop on Pinterest and this Blog.. other than that.. no crazy shit for me anymore.. Social media is nucking futs mostly !! hahah Hence the catch 22.. because I am such a social person.. Mostly an in - person kindah social gathering.. but cant really do that anymore much except for hanging with neighbors outside a bit.. My life is FUBAR and it sux ass !!!💛💜💙💗

Adventures still to be had

My list is long.. (but I'm condensing to only 10 things)

Learn to play Chess
Learn to play Piano
Sky Diving
Hot Air Balloon ride over Grand Canyon
Visit Arlington Cemetery.. Tomb of Unknown Soldier etc
See Mt. Rushmore
See Lady Liberty up close & in person
Visit Hawaii.. see Volcano in person
After Sooooo many years of Marriage.. I would love to have an actual Wedding ceremony or re-new vows and do something in grand style
Have a Day.. with no pain, no sickness, no ggrrr… just have one PEACEFUL and HARMONIOUS day

Seeing as how I left so many out.. I might change this from time to time to add other stuff in the mix .Keeping it real people.. just keeping it REAL !

Lighten up Already

A man walks into a bar and sees his friend sitting beside a 12-inch pianist. He says to his friend, "That's amazing. How did you get that?"

The man pulls out a bottle and tells him to rub it and make a wish. He rubs the bottle, and a puff of smoke pops out and tells him that he can have one wish. So the man thinks and says, "I wish I had a million bucks."

The genie says, "OK, go outside, and your wish will be granted."

The man goes outside, but all he finds are ducks filling the sky and roads. He goes back in and tells his friend what happend, and his friend replies, "I know. Did you really think I wanted a 12-inch pianist?"